Recently a midlife woman friend asked me where does the idea come from that a Prince Charming character will come along to take care of and provide for you?
In her life of several partnerships, she had to do most of the caring for him and the family, and often do the providing too.
Her experience may not be common but nonetheless there’s a deep-rooted belief that a Prince Charming will come along, sweep you off your feet and take care of you and the family for the rest of your life.
I am sure it has been known to happen, but it is not that typical. And when it comes to midlife relationships, it is probably even less common.
So where does this Prince Charming myth come from? We decided it starts with fairy tales told us as children.
Then along comes Disney. We all like happy endings of course but they are still programming our unrealistic expectations.
Then it is reinforced by adult fiction, from Jane Austen to Mills & Boone.
Then Hollywood gets in on the act with a regular diet of Rom-Coms from Notting Hill to The Intern.
If we know these are fantasies, then we can still enjoy them as such. However, the programming from childhood produces unrealistic expectations in many, and inevitable disappointment.
This disappointment does not just hit women. It affects men too. They have been led to believe they must be a competent provider who can guard and protect the family nest with wealth and power. When they find they can’t fulfil the Prince Charming role, it leads to disappointment in themselves.
This accounts for the disgruntled, even embittered, state in which we find many midlife men!
The solution is for midlife women to take leadership in their relationships. I don’t mean that they should become more masculine and butch. On the contrary, they should take leadership in a feminine and caring way.
I have been writing about this as part of my on-line programme called ‘How to Find Love – A Guide for the Midlife Woman. You can find out more about it here …….
Warning: Use of undefined constant CHILD_THEME_TEXT_DOMAIN - assumed 'CHILD_THEME_TEXT_DOMAIN' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/customer/www/lovemidlifewoman.com/public_html/wp-content/plugins/glam-functionality-plugin/glam-functionality-plugin.php on line 40
Add A Comment