Why did I include the words Love and Sex in the title of my book?
In my opinion, the issues midlife women encounter with love and sexual fulfilment are the major obstacles that prevent them from embracing the fantastic opportunities that are there for them as New Midlife Women.
Love is a much used and abused word. It has to cover a multitude of relationships and yet is used widely without clearly defining what it means in the particular context being spoken or written about. In this book we are concerned with ‘love’ in relation to intimate relationships between couples. Even here, there are different sorts of love and the nature and quality of love in midlife is very different from what went before, which I discuss in the book.
Sex is a word which has only recently escaped from the shadows. For many generations Sex was considered a dirty word not to be mentioned in polite company.
Even the word Love was dealt with in a very cautious way because in many minds it was considered a substitute word for Sex.
I believe it is time to discuss frankly what our sex drive is and the benefits of actively harnessing, developing and enjoying it in the second half of our lives.
Gender is a term that needs examination too. Until quite recently ‘Gender’ has generally been regarded as fixed and immutable, like the laws of gravity. Whichever sex or gender you were born with determined your destiny and had a clearly laid out path for you to follow. Anyone who deviated from their path was considered a freak or a criminal. In western society we have seen a dramatic loosening of those perceptions although other societies still stick rigidly to them.
This is particularly disorientating for women in middle life who were brought up with certain long term expectations. Now they find themselves in a topsy-turvy world looking for a mirage of love portrayed by the media, which does not seem to exist for them.
Midlife may be a new concept to you. Have you heard the term Midlife Woman before? It is most definitely not a middle aged woman!
It comes from one of my heroines, Marianne Williamson. She wrote the book The Age of Miracles – Embracing the New Midlife back in 2008.
Although the Midlife concept applies to both Men and Women, Marianne has much more to say about how it presents the opportunity for women to step into their ‘power and their greatness’.
I have kept the term ‘Midlife Woman’ loose in terms of age because today middle life can start in your thirties and extend to ‘senior citizens’. It applies to you if you feel it does, irrespective of age. Midlife follows the end of the age of innocence and is the time of awakening to who you really are.
In the following chapters we will look at how the powerful forces of Love, Sex and Gender are changing our perceptions. We will also see how the turbulence in these areas provides an opportunity for midlife women to build a happier, more purposeful and more fulfilled life for themselves.
To find out more about the book’s progress and how to get extracts from it at no cost – come and see us on our Facebook page Love and the New Midlife Woman.
Guidelines and examples for writing a Review
First- It should be short – around 50 words is best.
Second – just vague praise is not very helpful to someone who is deciding whether to read the book. So be specific.
Third – people want to know what you learned from the book and what stuck in your memory
Fourth – if there was something you disagreed with in the book or felt was left out, please say so. People like controversy.
Here are two examples which you may find helpful –
Jean Macdonald’s book Love Sex and the Midlife woman is a joy to read, with a writing style that skips along and informs without being boring or dry. The book is un-put-downable, insightful, amusing and entertaining. A couple of nuggets she talks about are the myth of the ‘Knight in Shining Armour’ and midlife men ‘Gold Diggers’.
Adrienne Marks – Murcia Spain (62 words)
This book has lots of interesting and novel ways to improve the sex life of the midlife woman and (hopefully) man. It gives insights from both sides of the gender issue with lots of new ideas and different ways of looking at what the midlife woman wants from life
Liz Spiby – Sandbach Cheshire ( 53 words)
I look forward to reading your review. Please send it to jean@lovemidlifewoman.com